I lied.
You’re not done for good.
You never will be.

You'll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart

Love never dies.
Inspired speech will be over some day; praying in tongues will end; understanding will reach its limit. But when the Complete arrives, our incompletes will be canceled.
We don't see things clearly. We're squinting in a fog, peering through the mist. But it won't be long before the weather clears and the sun shines bright! We'll see it all then, see it all as clearly as God sees us...
But for right now, until that completeness, we have 3 things to do:
Trust steadily in God.
Hope unswervingly.
Love extravagantly.
And the best of the three is love.

1 Corinthians 8-13
The Message

Aaahhhh! Part Deux

Steele and Kim have both come up to me on separate occasions and said they liked my tape and really want to use me. The timing is kinda bad because we're heading into summer and there aren't as many venues, but that'll give me time to sort some things out with God...like the immense fear I have of actually singing in front of people.
The other cool thing is...another girl who's interested in singing wants to start an all girl band. Tonight she said, "Do you know how cool 3-part harmonies would be???" Strange/Awesome because I was thinking the same thing this afternoon. Great minds...

Anyway, this whole thing has been yet another reminder that if you give your thoughts and hopes and desires and fears to God, He can make things happen that you would have never imagined.
Don't you hate it when you have to learn the same lesson over and over? Hopefully this time it'll stick.

Faith like a child

I was not looking forward to having to be in childcare last Saturday night. I hadn't been able to hear a sermon for over a month, between having to work and having to spend the nights I wasn't working taking care of kids. There were only a few kids, and there were 2 other adults, so I contemplated asking them if it would be alright if I left and listened to the service. I felt like I desperately needed to be in the next room learning about God. But He had something else in mind...
There are always those kids that attach themselves to you. You have a special bond for no apparent reason. That was the case with a little girl named Taylor. I was sitting on the floor and she came with a book that she'd grabbed off the shelf and sat in my lap. It was a book of Bible stories.
The experience was nothing new, I've read Bible stories to kids before. But as I was reading to Taylor, I thought of something. The stories I was reading are the most important stories she'll ever hear. The story of Jesus dying and the tomb being empty 3 days later is the most important thing anybody will ever tell her. She might not remember. She may or may not choose to give her life to God, but for those 5 minutes, I was the lucky person who had a chance to tell her how much He loves her.
It was such a privilage.

Aaahhhh!

So, tonight a friend of mine did something for me that I probably would have never done myself...
Anyone who spends any length of time around me can probably tell that I'm a music junkie. I sing constantly. Half the time I don't even know I'm doing it. It gets really bad when people ask me to repeat what I said and I have to say, "I didn't say anything..."
This friend rode with me to church tonight and when she got in my car she heard this tape that I had recorded. We talked about how I eventually wanted to talk to the couple in charge of worship at church, but I was scared because I didn't know if the time was right and I didn't want to step on anybody's toes.
At the Next Level in breakoff groups, the guy who normally leads worship prayed for more leaders and specifically more musicians. After we were done my friend went to my car, took the tape, and gave it to him.

Yeah.

It's really scary, he could say he totally hates it and I should never sing another song as long as I live. But honestly, that fear is a better feeling than what I had been feeling...wanting to say something but being too afraid to even do that. Now it's totally out of my hands and God has complete control. I can rest in the fact that His timing is perfect, and if nothing happens, then it wasn't meant to be right now. It's also really cool because now they know that I'm interested, and with all the campus ministries in the works the possibilities are endless.